


yule shoot your eye out

by deadbrave



Series: the adventures of dallas dixon & matt meir [2]
Category: Band of Brothers (TV 2001)
Genre: F/M, M/M, Modern AU, Multi, holiday fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-13
Updated: 2020-12-13
Packaged: 2021-03-11 05:21:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,416
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28029963
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deadbrave/pseuds/deadbrave
Summary: “Yep. By the sound of it, they already finished opening gifts. Sobel is here, so be careful where you step.” Eugene’s brows furrowed in both confusion and mild fear before Matt elaborated, “The dog. You really think I’d let Herbert Sobel into our home?”“It’s Hanukkah. I don’t know if there’s a rule where you have to be nice to him.” Roe laughed softly, “I’m going to go change into that horrible sweater Dallas bought me the other day. I’ll be down in a minute.” He leaned in to press a kiss to the edge of Matt’s lips, warm fingertips ghosting along his shoulder before he headed up the stairs.Matt pressed his thumb to his bottom lip, skin still tingling where he was touched. “There isn’t! I don’t care if he’s Jewish, he ain’t coming here, even during Hanukkah!”
Relationships: Carwood Lipton/Ronald Speirs (background), Edward "Babe" Heffron/Eugene Roe/Original Male Character(s), Joseph Liebgott/Original Female Character(s), Lewis Nixon/Richard Winters (background)
Series: the adventures of dallas dixon & matt meir [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1997509





	yule shoot your eye out

**Author's Note:**

> listen ;;; if i see one more of you write Joe Liebgott celebrating Christmas and not in a distant, Jewish friend sort of way, i swear to god I'm going to lose it.   
> anyway...happy holidays y'all! happy hanukkah and merry christmas to those who celebrate! 
> 
> mostly, merry christmas to k, who deserves the entire world but will have to settle for this from my gift giving love language ass. here's to another year with you putting up with me!

“No, fuck you, I spun a Gimmel.” 

“No, you didn’t. Stop trying to cheat! That was a Shin. I have fucking eyes, Lieb.” 

“Nah, the pot is mine,” Liebgott reached between the two of them for the pile of chocolate gelts in the middle of the table at the same time Matt moved to block him from them, resulting in the later slapping the former’s hand to get him the fuck away from the pot. 

“Why do you do this every year?” Matt bemoaned, snatching up the dreidel so that it was no longer in play. “You try and cheat Mary like this?” 

“Of course not! I actually like Mary,” Joe grinned, sharp and toothy as he unwrapped and popped a gelt into his mouth. _Chocolate loving fucker_. Before Matt could respond with an equally scathing reply, Dallas entered the front door with Babe, shopping bags ladden upon the lanky ginger boy’s arms. He was grinning ear to ear, though, so it was obvious that Babe himself did not mind being a pack mule. 

“You boys getting along in here?” Dallas questioned, perfectly manicured eyebrow arched. Matt’s eyes told an entirely different story than what left Liebgott’s mouth. 

“Just peachy, Dal. What did you and Babe get?” Joe’s curiosity was piqued and it was clear that he was moments away from digging through the numerous bags himself. 

“Oh, you’re going to love this, Joe.” One should be wary of Dallas’ smile, mischievous as it was. Selecting a bag carefully, Dallas tugged forth two truly hideous, yet hilarious Hanukkah sweaters that could only amuse the most Gen Z of Jews. 

“You better be tellin’ me that the [Jewnicorn one](https://images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com/images/I/81PYpFZE3%2BL._AC_UL1500_.jpg) is for Matt, ‘cause I ain’t wearing it.” Joe crossed his arms, lips pulled back to bare his teeth in distaste.

“No, the Jewnicorn one is definitely for you. Matt gets [the other one](https://images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com/images/I/71VOgj6CMwL._AC_UY679_.jpg) because it’s as embarrassing as the Jewnicorn sweater is for you.” Dallas was evil, Matt was now certain of it. His cheeks were already ruddy at the thought of wearing what was offered to him, and he sent a glare Babe’s way at the AUDACITY that he allowed this to happen. Babe looked apologetic, at least. 

Dallas handed the boys their respective garments, grinning maliciously the entire time, plucking a few more bags out of Babe’s arms to lighten the load. “Remember that Dick, Lew, Lip, and Ron are coming over later for our gift exchange. Obviously, y’all don’t have to be involved but please behave. I don’t think they want to deal with you fighting all night.” 

“As long as that dog’s coming, I’ll be perfectly civil.” A couple of years ago, Dick and Nix adopted this absolutely precious Pitbull mix pup from a shelter who they dubbed Sobel after a truly horrific colleague they’d worked with for nearly five years before he was fired for bullying and harassing multiple students. Weird that they named their dog this, but Matt had this theory that it was a weird power play for Nixon, and Dick just went along with it because he loved him. 

“Of course he’s coming. Does Nix go anywhere without that dog?” Babe was there for the very distinct and disastrous breakup of one Lewis Nixon and formerly Cathy Nixon--it wasn’t pretty, he was haunted and heartbroken at the expression on Nix’s face as he realized that he’d never get to see his dog again. 

“Well, I better get started on cooking for me and Lieb, then,” Matt sighed, slinging his sweater over his shoulder as he turned the corner and mounted the staircase at top speed. Listen, it was hard enough to cook for Joe in general (because he insisted that Matt did everything the way his mother did and let’s be honest, Matt was quite obviously and clearly not his mother), it would take forever with all the bickering that would incur and, in addition, Babe loved to butt in and taste things, which was only encouraged by Matt. One could not simply look at those big brown puppy eyes and say no. 

Once appropriately dressed in the most obnoxious and embarrassing Hanukkah sweater that had ever been witnessed paired with a [suitable apron](https://i.etsystatic.com/11026630/r/il/6c3b16/2117014565/il_1588xN.2117014565_tjy1.jpg) (one gifted to him by his mother many Hannukahs ago), Matt headed back into the kitchen, prepared to cook an immaculate feast. Of course, it wouldn’t be any sort of holiday cooking if Liebgott weren’t sitting at the kitchen table, making annoying comments whilst scrolling through his Twitter feed.  
“Make sure you use the kosher pans.” 

“No, Joe, I was just thinking I was going to ignore shit I’ve known my whole life and mix up the pans like a moron. Seriously. What am I, a child?” 

“Yeah, pretty much.” 

Matt sent a glare Joe’s way before he got to work on the Matzo balls for soup. Although this was, traditionally, a dish used for Passover, it was one of Matt’s favorites, so he tended to bring out the recipe year-round when expected to cook for more than one person. After the Matzo ball soup was set and simmering, Matt moved onto the sweet potato Kugel since it took almost as long to cook, and finally began to work on the Latkes, which was, of course, when Babe came into the kitchen and offered his taste testing talents. 

Although devoutly Catholic, Babe, and even Roe, had both developed quite the appetite for traditional Jewish foods since they’d begun dating Matt, and honestly, it was quite a victory in his humble opinion. The fact that they’d join in on festivities upon occasion and enjoyed the meals Matt slew over would make his mother proud, which was really all that he could ask for from his partners. “Are they good?” Matt asked, gaze expectant as he watched Babe wolf down a Latke like he hadn’t eaten in days. 

“Spectacular, Matty, your best work yet.” Babe pressed a too wet and slightly oily kiss to Matt’s cheek before he headed back into the living room and whatever the hell nonsense he and Dallas were up to. 

“You hear that Joe? My best work yet. If I hear one complaint tonight, it will be physically impossible for me to believe you.” Matt wiped the sweat from his brow with his forearm, squinting as he inspected the bubbling pot of soup. 

“Eh, I’m sure I’ll find something wrong,” Joe replied, nonplussed. 

“Fuck you.” 

Meanwhile, in the living room, Babe and Dallas poured over last-minute gifts and what could only be described as the pure and unadulterated suffering of wrapping oddly shaped objects in seasonal and cheesy cuts of paper. Babe had already managed to slice himself two times on sharp edges, which Dallas had promptly, to avoid the Puppy Eyes of Doom, protected against the bacterium of the air, covered the wounds with Star Wars band-aids. It wasn’t that Babe had to be babied, he just preferred to be cared for by the other members of his household. It was something that happened often to the youngest sons of a mother with multiple children--the want had simply transferred from mother to housemates. Except for Liebgott, who simply refused to baby anyone, except Mary, and sometimes Dallas, if he was in the right mood for it. 

“I don’t care what anyone says, Speirs still kind of scares me,” Babe was still hoping to find a way to skirt around the man when he entered their home later in the evening. 

“Just because you didn’t get along well when you guys took that one college course does not mean y’all can’t be civil now. Hell, he nearly strangled Lieb when he was in that one Roman History class, but they’re thick as thieves. I think you just have to find a sort of middle ground. You love Lip, don’t you?” 

“Of course. He’s the only reason I got through Freshman year.” 

“Okay, so do it for Lip. You could even talk about something involving him if it helps. You know once Speirs starts talking about Lip he never shuts up. Worse comes to worst, you’ve got that.” Dallas was, upon occasion, far wiser than her years. 

“That’s true. Thanks, Dal,” Babe sniffed, scrunching his nose at a particularly botched wrapping job, gaze apologetic as it met Dallas’. She could only chuckle and pat his arm sympathetically. “Are you excited for this to be your last year at Penn State? I know you and Matty have been busting your asses. I know for sure you’ll be the two best damn vets out here.” 

Dallas couldn’t help but grin--although she’d gone into the Veterinary program at Penn State thinking she would be leaving with just a degree and a want to save animals, now she was leaving with a pain in the ass but loving boyfriend, a best friend and, in addition, practically an entire new family that she couldn’t see herself giving up anytime soon. It was the best outcome possible, and nothing had ever felt so right as her life right now, even sitting right here, with Babe, no matter how terrible the man was at wrapping gifts. 

“Thrilled. One more semester, which is basically just an internship and then being able to actually help animals? It makes everything we’ve been through worth it. Sobel’s dumb ass included.” How the man had even been allowed to become a teacher, Dallas did not know but was quite certain that there was some sort of nepotism involved. “You go ahead and get ready, the boys will be here soon. I’ll finish up the gifts.” It was partially for Babe’s sake as well as her own--honestly, it’d just be quicker and more efficient if Dallas wrapped by herself. 

“Thanks, Dal!” Babe grinned and practically galloped up the stairs, taking two at a time. Dallas could only laugh and shake her head before focusing on the task at hand, brows furrowing in concentration. 

The sun was beginning to sink beneath the horizon, which only meant one thing: it was almost time to light the Menorah. Joe had even (reluctantly) tugged on his Jewnicorn sweater with little complaint, or what could be considered little from him. Matt grabbed a box of candles bought specifically for this purpose from the closet hallway and Lieb a box of matches from his and Dallas’ room when they met in the middle, joined by two voyeurs in the living room. Dallas and Babe sat on the couch, watching the duo with rapt attention and reverent silence. Perhaps someday they would be comfortable enough to participate themselves, alas, that day was not today. The Menorah was, of course, already positioned in the sill of the large glass window that faced the bustling city below them. 

Matt handed Joe the _shamash_ , who proceeded to place it in its elevated spot on the Menorah, then followed up with three additional candles, filling the three holders farthest to the right. Joe picked up the _shamash_ once again and left enough room for Matt to be able to hold a section of it as well, striking a match with his free hand (the talent, really!) and lighting it. _Shamash_ held between their joined hands, the duo began to say the blessings. “ _Baruch Atah Adonai Eloheinu Melech HaOlam, asher kidshanu b’mitzvotav v’tzivanu l’hadlik ner shel Hanukkah_.” 

“Amen.” Piped up a voice from behind them, and Matt couldn’t hide the quirk of his lips, though he remained stoic. Perhaps Babe was learning something and becoming slightly more comfortable. 

“ _Baruch Atah Adonai Eloheinu Melech HaOlam, she’asah nisim l’avoteinu, b’yamim haheim bazman hazeh_ .” ‘Amen,’ was repeated behind them once again, and, with that, Joe and Matt lit the remaining candles, from left to right, before they replaced the _shamash_ in its correct holder. They stood for a beat, in silence, staring at the flames; Joe bumped his shoulder against Matt’s and grinned, far softer than his normal wolfish one. There was a reason that Matt liked having Joe around, and he was far more than just what he liked to take the appearance of--Joe was a good person with walls built of stainless steel. He’d repel absolutely everything that he could, but sometimes, for the right people, Joe’s heart of gold shone through. Matt considered himself lucky. 

Then, a loud chorus of voices emitted from the kitchen, as well as the sharp bark and claws clacking against hardwood that could only be Sobel bounding into the living room. There was absolutely nothing cuter than the sweet pup donned in a [Reindeer costume](https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/710IR6hsnuL._AC_SL1500_.jpg), especially [to Dallas](https://img.huffingtonpost.com/asset/5de6902721000064df34edf1.jpeg?ops=crop_0_0_768_839%2Cscalefit_720_noupscale) when he lept up into her lap, licking at her face with abandon. “It’s nice to see you again, too, Soble. Gah, I still can’t believe Nix named the damn dog Sobel.” Just saying the name made a shiver run down her spine, though, alas, she couldn’t be too mad when the creature was as precious as this. She cradled Sobel to her chest as she and [Babe](https://i2.wp.com/teeqq.sfo2.digitaloceanspaces.com/2019/04/merry-corgmas-we-love-corgi-dog-cute-ugly-christmas-sweater-2.png?ssl=1) ran their fingers through his soft fur. 

Joe wrapped a palm around Matt’s neck and wheeled him in the direction of the doorway, Matt’s features lighting up as soon as he saw the men standing across from him. Matt was, by far, the most affectionate person of all the housemates, which developed from a lack of it in his childhood. Though the others weren’t on the same level as he was, they understood and gladly endured what was offered to them. Matt ran forward and practically threw himself into Lipton’s arms, wrapping himself so tight around the other man it was almost suffocating, stuffing his face into his neck. 

“Hey, boy. I missed you, too.” Lipton laughed but held on just as tightly. He and Ron had graduated last year and thus, the gang hadn’t seen as much of them as they’d like, especially Matt who had started to see them both as older brothers. The other three men got much the same treatment, though all took it in stride, even [Nix who was](https://cdn.shopify.com/s/files/1/0090/5255/3296/products/1601891812dba1df61e8_22e311e0-8fb0-4724-a574-1333344853e0_720x.jpg?v=1604474792) practically repulsed by physical touch from anyone [other than Dick](https://thewholesaletshirts.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/10/10223_4971_0x2-33.jpg). 

“We brought you boys some _Loukoumades_ , made sure they were Kosher,” Dick offered Matthew the cardboard box of treats after their embrace, “Happy Hanukkah.” 

“Thank you, Sir,” Matt paused when he realized what he said--dammit, that shit was ingrained in him. Stupid college. “I’ll go put these away. Y’all can go ahead and start the gift exchange.” While Matt made his way to the kitchen, the men made themselves comfortable; Joe settled behind Dallas on the couch, wrapping an arm around her waist and nestling his cheek against her shoulder (which was a little difficult with the overexcited pup in her lap). Dick and Lewis took up the remaining seating on the loveseat, while Ron knelt beside the tree and handed presents to Lipton to give out. 

They did a secret Santa every single year, yet somehow, _every single year_ , some bitch (likely Lipton, the softie), got every person a gift, even Matt and Joe, though obviously in Hanukkah wrapping paper, because he was a gentile, not an asshole. Joe found it incredibly lovely, even if he was too grumpy to admit it most times. Matt tried to tell him a million times that it was really only children who received gifts for Hanukkah, but Lipton was not to be deterred, which was quite admirable. Plus, who would refuse a gift? It was just bad manners. 

The opening of gifts was brief and intense, refuse thrown to the wind as grins and laughter ran amuck through the room. Ron was the official garbage collector, as he loved to hold the Classique dad bag of trash, it’s just the vibe, we don’t question it. Sobel darted after Speirs the entire time, nipping at his heels and rolling about the paper that was yet to be collected. Ron was in such a good mood, he didn’t even seem to care about that fact, though he did push the pup away once he started to tear up the wrapping paper and chew it, which would make a horrific mess. 

Meanwhile, whilst Matt was in the kitchen, placing the _Loukoumades_ on the counter and nabbing a Chinese takeout menu from the junk drawer, Roe came through the front door, looking weary and drained, face tones paler than usual. It was the holiday season--it surely had been busy in the ER. “Hey, Gene. Long day?” 

“Long day. Everyone here already?” Eugene questioned as he tugged off his coat, tucking it into the nearby closet. 

“Yep. By the sound of it, they already finished opening gifts. Sobel is here, so be careful where you step.” Eugene’s brows furrowed in both confusion and mild fear before Matt elaborated, “The dog. You really think I’d let Herbert Sobel into our home?” 

“It’s Hanukkah. I don’t know if there’s a rule where you have to be nice to him.” Roe laughed softly, “I’m going to go change into that [horrible sweater](https://www.tipsyelves.com/mas_assets/cache/image/4/6/8/2/18050/Mens-big-package-sweater-01.Jpg) Dallas bought me the other day. I’ll be down in a minute.” He leaned in to press a kiss to the edge of Matt’s lips, warm fingertips ghosting along his shoulder before he headed up the stairs. 

Matt pressed his thumb to his bottom lip, skin still tingling where he was touched. “There isn’t! I don’t care if he’s Jewish, he ain’t coming here, even during Hanukkah!” He called after Eugene, shaking his head as he meandered into the living room. Matt plopped down on the couch next to Babe, worming into his boyfriend’s arms, sighing happily as he leeched heat from the constant warmth that was Babe’s body. He handed the takeout menu to the redhead, “Figure out what you want, pass it around and I’ll order it.” 

Babe rested his cheek against Matt’s temple, humming to acknowledge the direction he was given. “You’re an angel, Matty.” 

“Careful saying that. Might go to my head. Then I really won’t know how we’d all fit into this tiny ass room.” As it was, [Speirs and Lipton](https://hottopic.scene7.com/is/image/HotTopic/11469516_hi?%24pdp_hero_standard%24) were curled up with their backs to the wall, though they were pretty snuggled up, so there were obviously no complaints. Lipton’s gaze met Matt’s across the room and he glanced toward a present that was clearly wrapped for him beside, not beneath, the Christmas tree. It was the little things. Matt shook his head and let out a small rumble of a laugh. Lip pursed his lips but grinned a moment afterward, so Matt knew that he was forgiven for not wanting to open a present currently. 

Eugene entered the living room, looking very embarrassed with the raunchy sweater he was donning, which caused Lewis to wolf whistle, fingers tucked up into the sleeves as he sat in front of Matt on the couch, leaning his cheek onto his boyfriend’s thigh. Matt dropped his hand so he could run his fingers through Gene’s cropped hair. 

“I’m just sayin’, I think Santa’s a fuckin’ creep. I mean, he sneaks around to every house in one night, stealing food and leaving shit in the houses while everyone’s asleep. I don’t know, man, it’s a little fuckin’ weird to me.” Of course, Joe had very strong opinions about everything. 

“You can’t mean that. First of all, to a child it’s not creepy, it’s magical. It teaches them that when they’re good, they get rewarded.” Lipton argued, brows furrowed. 

“Obviously, it’s just a means to control children. If you’re bad, you get nothing or coal. If you’re good, you get something. It’s blackmail.” 

“Oh, for Pete’s sake, Ron.” Dick huffed, rolling his eyes. 

“It’s not blackmailing! It’s teaching kids generosity!” Dallas inserted, pursing her lips at Speirs. “You both are so jaded.” 

“There’s nothing wrong with givin’ people, especially kids, somethin’ to smile about.” Babe was as pure and good as ever, in distinct opposition to Joe’s cynicism. 

“He’s just trying to rile you up, don’t listen to him.” Dallas turned her head just enough so that she could look at Joe with mildly crossed eyes. He was grinning, of course, the little shit, as he flipped through the takeout menu. “Aren’t you, Joe?” Her tone lowered, a small smirk curling the edges of her lips upward. 

“Shh. Babe, I can’t sew discourse if you’re blowin’ my cover.” Joe looked up from the menu, gaze filled with amusement. 

“You’re an idiot, and you’re lucky I love you.” 

“That’s right, Dal. Now you’re stuck with me. Terrible choice, Merry Christmas.” 

“Happy Hanukkah.”

**Author's Note:**

> if you're curious as to the sweaters that everyone is wearing, please click the links through the fic and suffer.
> 
> re: the date of this fic lmao because i am very specific, it takes place in 2019, when the 3rd night of Hannukah was on Christmas Eve. 
> 
> also, i am a goy so please let me know if any of the hannukah related content is incorrect. i try my best with the limited knowledge that i do have, and i am in no way trying to be offensive, so please let me know if i am!


End file.
